The idea that bean salad is difficult to make is a lie perpetuated by Big Bean to keep you in their thrall.

Core Ingredients

• Canned beans. A bean medley is preferred. We’ve used anything from a four-bean mix up to an eight-bean mix.

• Salad dressing. Probably Italian dressing.

Preparation

• Open the can.

• Drain and rinse. You can rinse it in the can. Or in a colander if you’re posh enough to wash the extra dish. Two extra dishes, since you can’t add salad dressing to a colander.

• Optional: put the beans in a bowl.

• Add store-bought salad dressing of choice.

Mid-Tier

• Prepare it in a large bowl and serve it on a plate.

• Defrost some frozen veg in the microwave and add it. Frozen corn is a personal favourite.

• Canned corn also tastes great.

• You can use olive oil and vinegar instead of store-bought dressing. Yes, it’s two ingredients instead of one, but it’s two ingredients that never go bad.

God-Tier: Approach with Caution

• Chop up actual fresh vegetables and add them. Onion, particularly red onion, is traditional in bean salad. So is celery.

You can eat it from the
can, but you are legally
obligated to say, “Fine like
this,“ as you do.

We cannot recommend
raw celery under any
circumstances, but we’ve heard
some people like it.